Avoidance and ADHD

by Brenda on December 8, 2009

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For a few weeks now, I have been meaning to open a second bank account at our bank. It’s really not that hard - the bank is close by, the people are very nice, and if I wanted, I could even do a lot of it online.

And yet, I have been avoiding it, putting it off. I have begun to dread my husband’s inevitable question, “Did you open that bank account today?”.

Why am I so affected by this?

I think for me, it revolves around my issues when it comes to money. I have a lot of them and in general, I try to avoid anything that has to do with the subject. It doesn’t matter how much or how little we have, I just don’t like talking about money.

I think a lot of we ADD Moms have avoidance issues of one kind or another. Maybe yours isn’t about money, but about something else. Doctor visits? Trips to the dentist or home to visit the folks? We come from the “if we ignore it it’ll go away” school of thought.

When we have something on our to do list that hits too close to our discomfort zone, we procrastinate. Maybe it will sort itself out. Maybe it won’t be so important in another week or two. I’ve got ADHD; I can say I forgot. And you do realize that part of what makes you keep putting it off is that need for an adrenaline rush that comes with ADD and putting things off til the last minute, right?

Just checking.

You know, the easiest thing to do is just to get it over with. You’ll feel so much better afterwards. Really. I promise.

Now if you’ll excuse me, I have a bank account to open.

{ 3 comments… read them below or add one }

Sylvia December 9, 2009 at 11:12 am

You probably had no idea when you posted this, that it would be seen by someone who NEEDED to see it and who feels the same dreaded feelings you described. I’m not new to ADD, but sometimes I ‘forget’ things, like about the adrenaline rush thing and your reminder that we will feel better, if we just do it. It was especially important to hear today, as I need ‘fortification’ to help my daughter who also has ADD, learn how to deal with her ADD as a gift, not a curse. thank you

Brenda December 10, 2009 at 2:03 pm

I always love it when something that I write touches someone else. Thank you!

Krys. December 21, 2009 at 5:52 am

I am exactly the same way with the bank. I’ve needed to stop there for awhile and my husband said the other day ” all it takes is turning into the parking lot and you are committed” to which I replied “and sit there for 15 minutes with the baby (bank doesn’t open till 8:30 and I’m leaving that town at 8:15) He had an answer for that too and he was right. I always have an excuse…er REASON for not doing it. Guess it’s time to take my own advice and get off my rear & on my feet & get it done. Next time I’m in town that is. (=

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